Writing Weaknesses

My writing skills are above average but there is room for improvement and technical expansion. The first and most obvious weakness is my lack of detail in much of my writing. I don't usually pay attention to detail in my own life so I find it difficult to incorporate it into my writing. I also feel like it seems forced when I put it into my writing. However, I know how important detail is to help guide the reader through my reading and help them in-vision what actions are taking place. The second thing I need to work on is not being to critical of what I put into my writing. I chose to keep certain things out thinking they would be irrelevant but it seems as though they might have done a world of good. I suppose taking chances might help me instead of trying to play it safe.

DPS Editorial

It's no secret that Detroit Public School's are struggling. As a future educator it breaks my heart to see this happening in a city I grew up next to and often visited. Detroit, to many I meet out of town, is my home. I do not wish to see it go down in flames and I refuse to allow it to happen.The children in the city did not choose to go to school there and the poor education available is not their fault. They deserve better. There are so many programs to help to improve this situation that not only high school and college students can be apart of but many graduates who are looking for something to fill up their days.

I  plan to write my editorial on the problems of DPS and how, as an ordinary citizen, one can help make a difference. I used to volunteer for a program called Beyond Basics that helped k-8 with writing and reading. I will probably mention this program as a starter for those looking to dive in and help. I will also use the experience to show my readers how rewarding volunteering can be.

Feedback

Out of the 3 person group I only ended up with one feedback paper to look at while working on my final draft. I sent my final draft to the other girl in my group so she could fill out her feedback sheet and e-mail me back a more in depth feedback because I only had my first two, very short, paragraphs done last week. However, the girl that did give me my sheet filled out was very pleased with what I had written. She did pose a few questions that I was able to work off of and make sure I answered in my memoir and listed a few comment I could work with. There is nothing she said that I will disregard but one question that stuck out to me as extremely important that I didn't think to make my reader aware of was that this was the first time I discussed this topic with someone and it was the first time I was experiencing it. It will absolutely help to make my story more clear and easy to understand by my readers. Until the feedback from the other girl is mailed to me that is all I can really comment on.